Time IS on my side...

Time keeps on ticking and with that, my mind is expanding with thoughts for the future of Kaffe Blue. I am learning that even the best plans can be halted due to circumstances uncontrolled. I know that all things do happen for a reason and i want to make the most of that in every area of my life.

With that in mind I am considering moving forward with TWO locations for Kaffe Blue. One in a commercial space with some of the original menu items, Second, my primary goal, the downtown location with an expanded TAPAS MENU. It is a challenge to think of running TWO restaurants but the thought really excites me.

So, what you think?

Remember the Source

I am in a new world. I have a short guideline on how to survive. Those around me are walking the same path I am though we all seem to be taking different approaches to our circumstances. I ask myself "why am I here"? The answer seems to be caught in a haze. The clarity has been removed because I look through a lens of uncertainty. I continually adjust my perspective. I still have not come to the conclusion that all is worth it but I know that some is worth it. Can I feel both? Is one the goal and the other collateral damage that comes with the territory? Can I truly have that which is perfect for my destiny or will I always have that shadow that slinks close to the edge of my dreams? I am a thinker. I am a doer. I am a restless soul that is searching for that thing that matters most. I have my family. I have my relationships and church. I have my faith in God. I have my health that was once on the brink of death. I have my moments. Moments when all is well and I have the strength to continue. I have my doubts. Doubts that envelop me and taint my view. A view that is supposed to be a beautiful landscape filled with opportunity and happiness. I don't want to miss a thing. I don't want to stumble and fall away from the very thing that gives me purpose.

You are my source of life. I can't be left behind. No one else will do. I will take hold of you. I need you Jesus to come to my rescue. Where else can I go? There is no other name by which I am saved. Capture me with grace I will follow you. You are the source of life and I can't be left behind no one else will do. I will take hold of you. I will follow you. This world has nothing for me. I will follow you.

Falling on my knees in worship giving all I am to seek your face. Lord all I am is yours. My whole life I place in your hands. God of mercy humbled I bow down. In your presence at your throne. I called, you answered. And you came to my rescue and I want to be where you are.

My life be lifted high. My world be lifted high. My love be lifted high. I called, you answered and you came to my rescue and I want to be where you are.

In the quiet in the stillness I know that you are God. In the secret of your presence I know there I am restored. When you call I won't refuse. Each new day again I'll choose. There is no one else for me. None but Jesus. Crucified to set me free now I live to bring him praise. In the chaos in confusion I know you sovereign still. In the moment of my weakness you give me grace to do your will. I am yours and you are mine. All my delight is in you Lord. All of my hope all of my strength.

I owe my life to the maker of heaven and earth. Only you can satisfy my soul. I need you more than anything. I love you more than anything. Anything.

I will listen to your voice. The voice of the one I love. He is calling my name. Come up higher and hear the angels sing. Come up higher my beloved. Come up higher leave this world behind You find me to be beautiful. I am running, Running after you. You have become my souls delight. Here with you I find my life.

Its a roller coaster and I am riding with no hands....

On what is turning out to be with of the scariest decisions I have ever made. 

I had no clue (even though many people tried to tell me) how scary owning my own restaurant was going to be. To go from working at a church with students and leaders on creating environments where people can experience a relationship with God and growth in their lives to a business that is as fickle as they come. I can literally walk in one day and every table is full and the servers are running around like chickens with their heads cut off because all 7 of their tables were seated at the same time and then walk in a day later and only 7 tables total are filled. Now dont get me wrong, 7 tables are better than no tables but when you have a lease payment that is crazy, a space that is large and a kitchen that is equipped as a small deli kitchen, creativity becomes a must need skill. 

With that knowledge I am thankful for my creative staff. I have some great servers. I have one that is consistent no matter the load or attitude of her day, I have 2 nurturers that are people lovers, I have a woman lover, ok make that 2 woman lovers and a new addition that is turning out to be a true servant at heart. Running this crew is a shepherd, a professional coffee lover who knows more about coffee then everyone put together and lastly a gentle soul that is expecting a child even as she serves everyone on the team.  This is just the front of the house! I have 7 more in the hot kitchen including my (superhuman) mom working hard to create a success out of Kaffe Blue. Of course last but not least is my dad who works for free and is my rock when I get discouraged. 

This month we are experiencing the September Slump. I am hoping that at any moment we will start clicking back up the track ready for the next spiral curve upside down spin and whatever else comes with the holidays. I will think of new ways to entice you in our doors, i will create new food that will make your mouth water, I will create an environment that will make you want to come hang out and talk with friends and the good part about all of this is I do not have to do it alone! 

Today I am thankful. That i have a roller coaster and the seats are filled with wonderful people that I work with every day. 

MASQuerade Time

Its party time for Logan. Stir Fry Cafe Private room this Saturday. Rea took some pictures for us to make an invitation. Looking to be a good time. 

Thats my girl

Logan is 16 today. 

When I first learned that I was going to have a baby girl I dreamed about her laugh, her character, her sense of humor, her goals, her relationships, her face, her voice, her imagination, her hobbies, how she would feel in my arms. 

16 years has passed and her laugh is contagious, her choices are wise, she is known to be silly without caring what others think, she know God has a hope and a future for her, she surrounds herself with great people, she is beautiful, she sings like and angel, she dreams of things unknown, she trys new things without fear, she is exactly what God wanted for me to have in a daughter.  I am so very thankful for her. Happy Birthday Logan! Love mama. 

THIS PICTURE WAS TAKEN BY RAEANNA ANGLEN who has been a great friend in Logan's life. She caught Logan just as I see her. 

Its About TIme...

Well Shame On ME! Time has went and I have not shared in a while. To be honest, I am living a groundhog day moment. It seems that everyday looks the same and I find myself doing the same thing. 

Until Sunday... I am part of a class full of young beautiful professional women. Some as teachers others as stay at home moms. Together we are figuring out what defines us. As Denise was speaking Sunday I had one of those great moments when a phrase that I had heard many times took on a new meaning. It starts with Adam and Eve in the garden, then eating the fruit, then God coming to see them and finding that they have hid themselves. He asks where they are and they reply we are hiding because we are naked. (HERE IT IS) and God says "WHO TOLD YOU" you were naked. 

I am all about filters. Ways that I can control my responses so that they are good. Ways that I think so that I have joy not stress. This is my new filter. WHO TOLD YOU. Someone can tell me that I suck, now i ask who told me. Is that person someone that I need to listen to or is it someone that spoke out of line. Same with the good. I am great. Is that a person that speaks with influence? 

From now on when words start to frame my world I am asking WHO TOLD YOU. I will receive only that which is good for me, which builds me up, which sets me free, which makes me stronger. 

 As for my groundhog days, well we will see. 

Go ahead and tell me, I know you want to.

When I was a youth minister I used to love the games where you put roadblocks up in the room,  blindfold a student and watch them flounder around while team mates yelled at them which direction to turn to reach the finish line. Cruel? Maybe a little but this was a trust exercise that at the time I believed we all needed to experience. And, well yes, I found it amusing.

 I hope all of you out there that are watching me as I am blindfolded, floundering through the roadblocks that is my life, are finding it amusing as well. The one thing that I ask. If you are near the finish line please keep yelling directions to me. 

Trust is a crazy beautiful thing. I am so thankful for all the coaches, friends and loved ones in my life that I know would lay down their life me as I would for them. I have no idea what is in front of me and I am not sure which direction I am supposed to turn to keep from stumbling over that stupid chair that someone put in the way, either way its teaching me something and i am ready to learn.